I'm not going to paint your name over my heart,nor paint over it,
it will seep through the new paint layer and show through again,
proving my humanity.
I'm not going to cry again,just so that you will listen,just to get your sympathies and to re-think,
It's already done with.
The pain dulls and comes back worse then a headache,worse then those silent nightmarish memories that i kept silent from you,
I'm ok but why do i kept thinking of it,what i did wrong,no matter what though i knew it would've happened,so many reason logic,my idiotic stupid logic,which at one point we considered the same,ours similar in every way(half of me wants to cry while the other half rolls my eyes but i have to get this out or try).
Which is ironic when i think today,when i question today the same words sung by my favorite pianist on my music player,''If he still love me then why does he leave me,he if still loved me then why does he leave'',it mixes with other lyrics of other songs as mind would always do,like a broken record still used for a remix and yet people say its ''strange but has a beautiful tune.''
Again the words come back again,i regret not saying ''i love you'' for the last time,not that it would matter but i'd get it out then,perhaps stop witting poetry of now and then,
but how can i die if i can barely cry,yes i can sleep now,yes they say im free now,
but can't  my young first broken heart stop looking at love with such somber eyes?
Cam my muse and my life be silent without the lose of sanity from this cruel world?